Have you ever heard of the Shame Game? It is an easy game, I used to play it a lot and I won a lot. Actually the Shame Game is a very difficult game to lose and is a very easy game to win.
The Shame Game only requires a few things and if you can master those things, you will win:
Negative Self Talk
Pessimistic Attitude
Say, Think, Express and have others join you in Saying, Thinking and Expressing anything and everything negative about who you are and the nature of who you are.
Basically anything self critical and negative helps you gain points in the Shame Game.
Like I said, the Shame Game is an easy game to play, but winning it does not bring happiness or achievement. It is one of the few games that when you play to win, you will ultimately lose.
~
Those of us with ADHD often live in the Shame Game. We are some of the best players and have the absolute supreme skills at pointing out our faults and negative traits. Few people can do it better than we can. The problem with playing the Shame Game, even as justified as we can create it, is that it automatically compounds our negative assumptions and beliefs. ADHD can be debilitating and yet, there are many ways to cope and overcome many ADHD traits. However, the thoughts we live with day in and day out are not created by ADHD, they are created by ourselves, our belief system from our personal experiences.
PTSD, Depression and Low Self Esteem are common in those with ADHD, but it is important to remember that even though those can be co-morbid, they are still separate issues. Each issue must be treated accordingly.
Play the Shame Game, justify it accordingly, WIN and I guarantee you have really lost.
My suggestion to anyone playing the Shame Game, you might be interested in the first book that got me started on the road to recovery and playing the Positive Game:
The Power of Positive Thinking

By: Norman Vincent Peale
~Bryan
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2 responses so far ↓
1 Lisa
“However, the thoughts we live with day in and day out are not created by ADHD, they are created by ourselves, our belief system from our personal experiences.”
This is so true Bryan. I hate the shame game, it is not a very nice game.
That is the book that got me started also, to condsider positive thinking. I didn’t totally “get it” though, until I read The Secret. It was then that I remembered that this what what Norman Vincent Peale was talking about in his book.
2 Dr Charles Parker::CorePsych
Take a look at this post to keep the shame down. Have seen many talk up ADD too much to their own detriment:
http://www.corepsychblog.com/2007/08/addadhd-make-it.html
and this one on real ADD people in the New York Times:
http://www.corepsychblog.com/2008/05/addadhd-real-pe.html
thanks!
Chuck
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